Wednesday, 30 December 2009

A walk in the forest...

When we're in Norway we use a lot of time to walk in the forest with Milla. She can go free here in the winter and you can really see that she enjoys it. She runs a lot and get very exhited if Jackie, our old dog comes along. Then she kinda bothers her, trying to dangle from her ears while she's running. Don't ask.
When Henrik and Simo decides to show their manliness and have a snowball fight, she has to be part of it.

Norwegian christmas.

My family and I have celebrated christmas abroad for many times, but for the last couple of years I've wanted to stay in Norway. Christmas abroad, and especially in the Canary Islands where a lot of scandinavians go can be pretty boring, and I'm not a beach whale, I like to explore if I go to another country.
Christmas in Norway is magical with the snow and the traditions. This year I got to taste a tradition long lost for me....the FOOD.

Basically, the Norwegian christmas food consists og meat and FAT and over here you can see the proof. My granmother scooped spoons of fat and fed the dogs, because to her big dissapointment nobody wanted a little fan on the side with their meat. I liked the meat cakes, but I'm not too fond of "Ribbe" that every norwegian eat of christmas eve; fat - meat - rib from the pig.

I had asked dad to get some new christmas decorations this year, and in an attemt of being modern I believe, he had bought ALL pink decorations and gold glitter! I bought some black decorations as well to spice it up and in the end I actually thought it looked pretty cool!

I got some really cool stuff for christmas, like the hat I've been wanting the whole winter, a digital frame, a cool bikino from GUESS, a book that I wanted, and giftcards and money and not to forget the new shoes and clothes for the gym.

Saturday, 26 December 2009

Merry Christmas!

We're finally in Norway and Christmas Eve has already been, and a successful one! We came to Norway on tuesday and have been so busy getting the last things we needed before christmas. Also my aunt and uncle came to celebrate with us for the first time in a REALLY long time! That was great! We also just spend the days relaxing and taking long walks with Milla. There's SO much snow, I don't think there's ever been that much! You can't even walk very long in the forest, and the cabintrip that I was planning with friends has to be on hold until there's less snow if we'll be able to go at all.

I hope you all had a great christmas eve!

Tuesday, 15 December 2009


Simo and I love dogs. *duh* And every year we've been to the annual dog show here in Helsinki. It's strange, because it comes completely by surprise every year, so this year Simo checked early, and as usual, the event was closer than expected.
So last sunday we eagerly went to the second day at the dogshow, where it would not only be finnish dogs, but dogs from Norway, Sweden and Denmark as well.
Simo wanted to see a race called Anatolian Karabash (also known as a Kangal Dog), and we went back and forth to the ring where 3 of this race would be competing. While waiting we also looked at all the other races and like every year I want more dogs when I'm there. There was about 21 Border Terriers, Milla's race and some beautiful Setters which I love.
There was a also a HUGE area with booths selling all kinds of dog related things from food to toys, to...CLOTHES. We bought Milla some nice natural treats and a new really pretty collar.
When we went back to see the Anatolian Karabash they never showed up. The judges even called the owner up on the speakers, but still they never came. He was very dissapointed, but we still had a great day, with lots of fun!

Monday, 14 December 2009

The new family.

Saturday was a fun day.
Being pretty tired after a night of partying on friday with my work mates, I still dragged myself AND Simo to the center to buy some last christmas gifts. But ofcourse we went to the sci-fi store first after hearing that DARTH VADER himself was gonna show up! I don't do blind dates, so I had to go and meet him since he will be my future husband...
(Oh...I crack myself up...!)

Thursday, 10 December 2009

Where has all the gentlemen gone?

When christmas shopping is going on you see the truth behind every mask that people wear. It's impressive how psycho people in a shoppingmall can be, and I think that it should be a left and right system like the road in christmas time to prevent stressed shoppers to crash into the people who just wants a safe shopping experience. What surprises me is that most of these people are men. I would expect the women to be more stressed and crazy, but no. It's the men. The shove me out of their way to get through a door before me, they see I'm coming behind them and closes the door straight on my face, the take the last space in the elevator without a second thought eventhough I was before them.


I know two gentlemen. My boyfriend Simo and my friend Carl Philip.
They actually THINK about it, work their routine around mine to make sure that a door is always open for me, actually they MAKE it their routine.
I'm so used to it by now that I actually catch myself being a bit rude sometimes and go first right away when someone opens a door.
But these days, that's a luxury problem.

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

The wheels on the bus goes round and round...part 2.

Yesterday I had been to the gym and was pretty tired when I was finished. I went to buy some home made chocolate at the mall I work out in, and for some reason I got kind of "high" from the chocolate. I went around smiling for nothing and felt like I was walking on a cloud or something. I've heard of this before, but never experienced it myself, and I guess concerning most "highs", the outcome can be surprising...?
So I sort of floated to the bus stop and there was a drunk guy there. He didn't have alcohol with him and I'm not actually sure if he was a drunk or just crazy.
When a woman came and stood next to him his mouth just opened like a huge big black hole and all kinds of devilish bullshit came pouring out! (I understand enough Finnish to understand the shit at least...that's always the first you learn in every language.)
I saw that people around us that were also waiting for the bus reacted differently to what he was saying but most of them looked at eachother with a "whatthehell"-look. All of a sudden he started to cough really violently and his whole body sort of had it's own life and his arms and legs went everywhere; to the sides, up in the air - you name it, while all sorts of goo came flying out his nose and mouth as he started to sneeze. After a loud sneeze he exclaims: "SWINEFLU!"
That just took me to a whole other level and I stared to laugh. Loud. I noticed that a guy started to laugh too and that ofcourse didn't help the situation and I actually had to move and go away to be able to calm down.
When the bus came I waited till he had entered before I did, 'cause from my experience weird people ALWAYS sit next to me for some reason. I don't know what it is in my face that screams out: "come sit next to me! I REALLY need a new pal to talk to!"
He sat in a space where four seats towards eachother and every time a woman sat down there he started talking. The thing is, he never stopped, not even after they left the bus and at one point the busdriver went to him and told him to be quiet or he'll throw him off the bus. Surprisingly, he did as he was told. A woman sitting by him with a friend came and sat next to me when her friend left the bus. We started to talk together and she was a lovely woman, telling me how she had been to Lofoten in Norway and all kinds of things.
I love to talk to people (maybe that's what the weird people see in me) and it's interesting to have a conversation with a complete stranger that you will probably never see again. This is something that is rare in scandinavia, and I would say most of all in Finland. When we started to talk I noticed that people were staring at us as if expecting one of us to be a complete psycho and attack the other. I have no idea what her name was. We probably have nothing in common really and the age was around 40 year between us. All I know is that she gave me something that day.
(Hopefully not the swineflu...)

Saturday, 5 December 2009

Nerd? Me?

Last week I went to the center to do some shopping and came across a window that I had forgotten about. I had passed it before when that store hadn't opened yet, but now it had. It was a sci-fi/fantasy store and it had a life-size C-3PO standing in the window. Everyone who knows me well knows that I'm a complete Star Wars nerd, and so naturally I went inside the shop.
I've been trying to find the white arena Padme costume from Episode 2 for a while without luck and asked the guy behind the desk for help. He told me that if I'm a Star Wars fan and interested in costumes and such I should have a look at two websites called 501st Legion and Rebel Legion. Basically it's a lot of Star Wars fans from all over the world who dress up as different characters and meet children and go to events for charity. The guy said that I would be a great Padme (that was great for me ego) and so I thought about it for a while.
Today I met two other members of the finnish group and their lovely children, and we decided that I will join them! I'm so exhited and can't wait to start on this new adventure and do some charity work for children.

Ah. I love my life.

This is the costume I'm looking for. This was done in Disneyland, my head on Natalie Portman's body.

Friday, 4 December 2009

Walk in my shoes...

The other day I was on a hunt for a new pair of training shoes, and ended up talking to this guy in a store selling shoes for runners. He showed me these new type of shoes called MBT. What's interesting with them is that their soles are curved, and so you have to balance when you walk on them.
I have always slouched my back especially when I walk, and Simo and others have always told me to straighten up. It's hard though, when you're so used to it and then it's really unnatural to think about it all the time. It just doesn't work. So these shoes are for people who slouch, 'cause when you all the time have to balance, you are working your inner abs constantly, and keeping your back straight. You just CAN'T slouch, it's not possible. I can feel it working already. My stomach muscles are sore and my back is hurting a bit, which the guy told me was completely normal in the beginning.
So this is something I can suggest to others with the same problem.

Thursday, 3 December 2009

Another exhibition!

On tuesday I went to the vernissage of the exhibition I'm part of this month. It's a groupexhibition with the members of the artclass I go to on thurdays. It was very interesting with very different work in it, and I got a good space there for my painting. We had a nude model in the course for a few weeks a while ago, and instead of just drawing or painting her straight forward, I wanted to put her into a setting. I thought it would be a great exercise. I decided to paint her as a fairy, at night time.
The funny thing is that she has similar features as me, like dark long (at the time) hair and so on, so many people think that it's me!
A woman there told me that an old man had looked at my painting and said: "A woman like that...that wouldn't be wouldn't be bad at all." LOL!

Monday, 30 November 2009

MTV Presents..."WHAT THE FUCK?"

MTV used to be a really cool channel. I remember when I was a kid and how much fun it was to flip through the channels and always through MTV many times to see if there happened to be some music that I liked on at the time.
MTV shouldn't be called MTV anymore. It should be called RTV (Reality TV).
I think nowadays the music is 15 percent and the rest in reality shows with names as "A Shot at Love", "From G's to Gents" and "Brooke Know's Best". All of them are of course designed to make us "normal" people look up to the rich and famous even more, because after all, that is very necessary for their business. And we LIKE to watch and imagine that life for ourself, it's great entertaiment.

But MTV has officially hit their rock bottom. I have just seen a commercial for their new upcoming show, called "What The Fuck?"
It seemed like a very similar show to "Jacksass" or "Viva La Bam, AGAIN, basically doing a bunch of stupid stuff for the camera.

I mean, what the fuck?

Tuesday, 24 November 2009

Wii Fit Plus!

For those of you who has Nintendo Wii and Wii Fit, this is really something you have to have! I'm not that type of person who buys anything and feels like I NEED stuff and do commercial about it, but this I have to tell about. This is basically an add on thingy for the Wii Fit with lots of new games to play and a calorie calcualtor. You can also weigh your pet or baby. I feel that that is maybe a bit unnecessary, but the games are great! The snowball fight is so funny, and you have a crazy Japanese-like obstacle course walk through and even juggling!
You really feel it afterwards in your whole body, it's great exercise!

Painting and painting...

These days I've been really busy painting. There is an exhibition coming up on thursday with the people from my art course. I was planning to have my painting inspired by the Route 66 trip this summer there, but it's big, and I haven't had the time to finish it. The teacher said that he really wanted me to exhibit that one there, but I don't wanna stress too much with it right now that I haven't been able to sleep and all lately.
So I've decided to give another painting instead so I can focus on getting this right, and not showing it before it's ready and I'm happy with it.
The funny thing is that after that decision I've slept really well...does it have a connection? I don't know.

And no, I don't usually dress up to paint...we were going out to see "2012". Not as bad as I suspected I might add.

Thursday, 19 November 2009

A little justice...

So Evan Chandler has takes his own life.
For those of you who don't know who he is, this article is for those who knows. And those who knows probably feels the same way as I do.
There is some small small justice in this world.


Monday, 16 November 2009

...and with winter came depression...

I've had problems sleeping for a while. I'm not exactly sure why, but I know that I think too much about stuff at night time that keeps me awake. Sometimes I don't and I just can't sleep. I'm in a stressful time right now, having an exhibition coming up the 30th of november that I'm gonna be in, but I don't think it's that either. Some nights I get no sleep at all, and it's exhausting to be so tired during the day, and having to have patience with children AND adults.
I'm a littlebit anxious also and feel a bit paranoid these days, and I cry easily. And I'm noticing that the weather is affecting me a lot. Gray, gray and gray.

This weekend was great; I had a friend over from saturday to sunday and we had so much fun. Then from saturday to sunday Simo had a friend over as well. Last night I got no sleep whatsoever eventhough I didn't go to bed especially late.
So this morning I decided to go to the doctor. She told me that I have a TINY depression (which is also what I thought) and that can cause the sleeping problems. I got some sleeping pills that I will take during a time of 3 weeks and hopefully it will help.

Good night!

Saturday, 7 November 2009

Winter is here!

Finally winter is here. Not that I'm so much looking forward to winter, but I don't like the phase between autumn and winter, the one that just has rain and boneaching cold. At least now the snow is starting to come and it gets much lighter outside. Eventhough it gets colder also, it always seems like it doesn't when the snow comes. It's not only me who likes the snow. Milla gets really happy when it comes and she likes to play in it. Her favourite is to cool down her snoute and play mole and make tunnels in it. Then she pops up with her face full of snow!

Friday, 6 November 2009


Sorry that this came so late! I had some problems with making the file smaller so that it would be possible to put it on the blog. It's also quite long; about 10 minutes. I hope you have patience to watch it, hehe.

Sunday, 1 November 2009

One more day!

I was supposed to answer the questions that you've asked me yesterday, but I had a reeeally lazy and wonderful day, and took everything easy, so no videoblogs for you then. So therefore, I give you one more day, and hopefully tonight after I've seen This Is It with a friend again, I'll do a videoblog and answer you. If not, You'll get it tomorrow. I've gotten questions already (I won't post them) and you have this extra day to come up with something more if you want to.

Ask away!

Friday, 30 October 2009

"This is it!"

On wednesday was the premiere for "This Is It!" here in Helsinki. I couldn't make it, but I still made my way to the big square by the biggest mall Kamppi here, to look at a MJ show before I went on my way. 400 dancers rocked the place with MJ dancing while a huge screen showed the trailer for the film. Thousands of people showed up to see, and it was ALMOST as crowded as on a real Michael concert. It was great to see people cheering to his music!

Yesterday I went to see "This Is It!" with Simo. I had refused to watch the trailer before and read anything about it, so I had no idea what to expect. I was pleasantly surprised when there was no teardropping music that was edited into the film to MAKE you cry. Obviousely some tears still came at the end of the film. One girl started to sob in the beginning of the film when a text came that said that Michael died in june (amongs other things...). Simo thought it was someone making fun, but I knew that MJ fans were sitting right there where the sound came from.
I liked the film. It was fun to see MJ just being himself. I can recommend it to anyone, also people who aren't fans. I don't think it's a fan movie, it's interessting for all. (Except maybe "Billie Jean" which might seemed to last forever.)
I must admit that I was shocked though, to see Michael looking so drained. After seeing that, I don't think that he looked "perfectly healthy" as many people said, before his death. I've been a fan for a long time, and seen hundreds of videoclips from his whole career. He's always been skinny, but I've never seen him THAT skinny. But he still managed to rock!

Tuesday, 27 October 2009

Saaanta Claus is coming to town!

...with yoghurt for y'all!

Sunday, 25 October 2009

Thrill The World!

Yesterday after I had been out with Jaana, I met some Michael Jackson fans by the Railway Station for "Thrill The World". It was basically the Thriller dance done by fans (and non-fans) ALL over the world at the exact same time, for us 03.30! I had decided to film instead of dancing, and I must say it was spectacular, seeing 89 people performing Thriller together! A lot of people showed up to watch the performance, and it got lots of applause.

Also showing you some pics with some cool zombies here.

A great saturday!

I don't go out THAT often, but when I do, I like to go out with a friend who likes to dance! My favourite party-friend is Jaana, we always have a good time. Yesterday we went to a place called The Circus, that I've never been to. It had a great dancefloor, but it seemed a bit that type of place where underaged rich kids go, and I saw characters looking like Paris Hilton, with pink dresses, blonde long hair and tiaras and even a guy who looked like Malfoy from Harry Potter! The music was pretty bad, but we still managed to dance, so that's good. The light-effects made up for it!

Hope you all had a great weekend!

Saturday, 24 October 2009

Time to ask!

I made this video a few days ago, I believe it was wednesday, but I coulnd't upload it before today, so a little late. So the deadline for asking questions is until next saturday. Ask away!

Tuesday, 20 October 2009


Amazing! My blog has been read 3000 times from january till now! I see more and more readers every day, and it makes me happy and inspired to keep writing. I hope that you will keep reading my blog and create a dialogue with me, and I hope that you will take the time to asnwer my poll on the right side of the site to let me know what you enjoy to read about here the most.

Thank you everybody!

Monday, 12 October 2009




A double espresso, please!

So I got up at 6.00 this morning, starting the day with a sugarfree Mad Croc energy drink before heading to the gym that opened at 7.00, after having a dream that I got too late to work today I might add, so arriving at the gym I walked fast pace in uphill on the treadmill for an hour burning 1000 kcal., to the shower, no time to wash/dry hair, and off to work trying to get there a bit earlier, don't really know why, maybe because being paranoid after weird dream, but maybe it would help with a coffee, of course it will, so off to Robert Coffee ordering a double espresso, sure I need it don't I, AAAAARGH *pain*, coffeeshock, I don't even like coffee, but at least this coffee was better than the one at work, any coffee would be better at the one at work, there's something about work coffee, I'm sure, double espresso is very painful, better cool it down with a Coca-Cola today, yes it's monday and I'll treat myself with a Coke with SUGAR, AAAAAAAH NIIICE!!!, what??? my boss calls me when I'm in the hallway coming up towards the work, have you slept in she asks, no have I I wonder, no, oops I mixed up the times of when I should have been at work and we all laughed a bit and I drank a bit of Coffee I mean Coke, THIS BETTER WORK!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGGGGGHXDBGSPPVHSIBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZOAUA


Saturday, 10 October 2009

Yantra you, yantra me...

Simo and I can be serious modern-hippie-teasers. Not because we particularly don't like modern-hippies, but...oh well. We just don't like them.
No, but seriousely... joking.

A few weekends ago, Simo and I got invited to a wedding of an old friend of him. There is a whole religion or faith if you will, connected to the Yoga culture, but the modern view on yoga is the physical part, that we know. Meditation and so on. The religion in itself is more complicated and Simo has a few friends who is part of it. So the wedding was a yoga wedding, and we felt a bit out of place there. I had put on my nicest dress that I bought in Los Angeles and was ready to shine. Simo had his suit on. When we arrived, we noticed that we were the only dressed up people there, most people there looked like they had mistaken the place for YMCA.
Also, children are supposed to be free. A parent is not suppose to correct the child, and we really noticed. The whole party was STUFFED with children, behaving like baboons, jumping all over the place! It didn't help that the adults looked at us as if they wanted us to join their...religion...

So with a little background here for you now, you might understand why I got pretty surprised to see Simo coming home with a Yantra mat. Some people calls it a yoga mat, but it has tiny acupressure points kinda like needles attacthed to it where you're suppose to lie on. In the beginning I was pretty sceptic, and especially since it was in my eyes, "a bit hippie", but I got surprised by how nice the feeling is after you've layed on it for a while. I had a terrible headache the day he bought it, and after 10 minutes of laying on it, it went away! It also helps stress, tension in the back and neck, makes the blood flow better and can even help you sleep better. So it's worth a try. (But it's painful in the beginning!)

Want to check it out more? Go to:

Friday, 9 October 2009

Being a housewife...

It's Simo's birthday today, and since we celebrated already with a very nice visit to the opera to see Mozart's Figaro's Wedding, the day has been pretty quiet. Simo is out with some friends, and I have baked a cheese cake for him as a night-after-party-snack. It's on the table infront of me, teasing me in this endless hour of waiting for my man..."Come on Elise, just a tiiiny bite", I hear. But no. I have to be strong. Especially since there's a chocolate chip pattern of a heart in the middle that will most definately be broken...

I asked Simo what kind of cake he wanted and he told me cheesecake, which I've never baked before, so it was fun. I like to bake, but do it very rarely, especially since I've been on a diet for a while. I found a site on the internet that had great recipes that I'd like to share with you:


Change of scene!

I've decided to change the layout of my blog. I got a bit bored with the old one and thought that I could spice it up with some season backgrounds and header while I try to learn about this thing called Photoshop (which I don't trust...).

Please let me know if you like it. There is a poll in the right side of the blog where you can vote if you do or not. If you don't feel free to comment and tell me why here.

Monday, 5 October 2009

Darn that buffet!

Yesterday was a weird day. Come to think of it, I've had quite a few weird days lately. Not bad days or anything, but just restless. It might be the weather that is telling me that winter if approaching - again, too early for my taste. Then again, the christmas mood is already coming a few months too early as well.

So yesterday I went with Simo who had some work to do eventhough it was sunday, to the center. My plan was to go to the gym while he worked. We hadn't had breakfast so we tried to find a place to eat, but all the places opened after 12. We planned to go to Memphis, my favourite American restaurant, but somehow ended up in a buffet that tempted our hungry stomachs.
After we ate a rather tasteless food there I went to the gym but found out that I couldn't really work out. My body just didn't seem to want to carry me very well, so after I did all the machines, I skipped the treadmill and went back to Simo's work. We decided to go home and watch a movie. We both felt a bit weird in the stomach but didn't think more about it really. After we had gone to bed, I went back up to go to the toilet. But as soon as I got up I got terribly nauseous, it kinda just hit me very hard and I threw up eight times! It's weird, I don't think I've ever gotten food poisoned before. I felt a lot better after it, but I am at home to day to recover compeltely.
One thing is for sure, no more fishy buffets for me!

(And no, it wasn't any meat that made me ill...)

Saturday, 3 October 2009

An important decision...

So I've changed something that I haven't done since I was 17.
I've started to eat meat again.

The reason for it is that I've felt tired for a while, and I know that there's nothing wrong with me. I have low iron, but take ironpills. I was talking to dad about it the other day, and I realised that I started feeling like this around the time when I became a "fake vegetarian", when I was 17. But it became so normal to feel tired, so I didn't think too much about it.
I have eaten chicken and fish the whole time, so the transition went without a problem. A lot of people said to me that I had to be careful eating meat again, so I didn't get sick. Not to eat too much too fast and so on. So far I haven't had any bad reaction, and I've eaten steaks, burgers and so on. So maybe my body needed meat and that's all. I don't know. I will have this as a test until next year and see if it affects me in a positive way. If it does, I will continue. So far I have felt better, but then again since it's so early in the test, it might be my mind playing tricks on me also.

Sunday, 27 September 2009

"Høstutstillingen" - Norwegian exhibition.

My grandmother sent me some pictures from the exhibition in Norway that I was a part of. I couldn't attend the opening myself which is of course a bit sad, especially since it's the biggest exhibition I've been in so far. She acted as my "voice" though (and probably a bit as my manager if I know her right...) and she said that my painting was taken very well, and a lot of people stopped by it and discussed it. There was really a lot of people there so that's very good, and I'm very happy.

A working saturday...

Yesterday was a weird saturday. I woke up at 7 to get ready to "go to work". Well actually, it was a seminar, with the work. We arrived at the hotel where it was held at and got a breakfast before it started. The lunch was good too, with some salad for me and pasta. The whole thing was finished around 16.00, after we had talked about the importance for children to play.

To not feel as if the whole saturday had been used for work, I asked Simo to meet me in the center and we'd go to the movies. We went with Simo's friend Taneli as well, to see "District 9". I had absolutely no idea what to expect. I love science fiction, but the problem is that very few of them are good in my opinion. However, this one was great! In the beginning I wasn't sure...I thought the aliens looked kinda silly and I wasn't sure about the style of the film, but as it went on, I got more and more sympathy with the aliens and realised that it wasn't a sci-fi movie, it's a movie about the human's greediness.

They also showed the trailer for "Avatar". I'm STILL not sure what to expect from that one. I get no feeling whatsoever when I see the trailer.

Thursday, 24 September 2009

Bravo! Bravissimo!

Simo has his birthday in october, but since I found a good present that had to be used now, I went for it. I bought tickets for the opera by Mozart called "Di Nozze De Figaro" (Figaro's Wedding). I've always loved opera, and especially Mozart. Simo and I have talked about going here many times, but it never really came to it. I saw that today was one of the last dates that they would have this one, and I've always wanted to see it. Since Mammy was here now for the exhibition, she came along too.

So we put on a dress and suit and looked our best and went tired but exhited to the opera. It was really fantastic. Not just the singing in itself that was flawless to my ears, but the setting and costumes. It was 3 hours long, not including a 20 minute brake. I wanted to to be longer hadn't it been for that I was quite tired. It was really funny, even today, and it's amazing how much of the humour is up to date and recognizable to us still. At the end of the opera, people clapped of course, and the actors/singer came in and bowed to the audience. Obviousely, I didn't know about here, but usually where I've been before, (EVEN in Norway!), people usually get up to stand to show their respect at the end of a show, especially when the main characters come out again on stage to bow. Not in Finland.
You barely clap here, but I was expecting with every new couple coming out to bow that that was the time to finally stand, but that moment never came. At the end the conductor came up on stage and finally made a hand gesture that signalized to stand. He had finally got it. I got up in a heartbeat, and Mammy soon followed. We were quite in front, and I started to wonder why Simo didn't get up. I looked around and found out after what seemed to be a REALY long moment of standing that the conductor in fact gestured to the orchestra, and not to the audience at all. Everybody was sitting down, except the two "french, crazy ladies." Whoops. Of course then it was too late and we had to stand by our choice and stand for some really difficult moments more, wondering of the audience clapped for the singers our their new entertaiment...

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

-"We're all individuals!" -"YES! WE'RE ALL INDIVIDUALS!" -" I'm not..."

Today when I was finished at work, I went to pick Simo up from his job. As I walked in the very center of Helsinki, I saw that there was a huge line of people waiting outside a nightclub. Since it was wednesday, I reasoned that it was probably a band playing, and some fans. I noticed that it was only girls in the line, a certain age, like from 15-19 maybe and they all tried to be very different and interesting in their style it seemed like. All of them had a crazy colour, dark clothes with bring colour popping suddenly up here and there. Don't forget the bags with the sewn pathces with logoes and pictures of bands and ideas you've probably never heard of. This is not a rare thing to see in Helsinki, and I believe we have the closest people to vampires here, and althought the need to be different and seen is there, they always walk in a group, with a piercing look that tells you not to stare at them.

But as I walked on, the line just continued, and the people seemed to mix into eachother, with all the colours of the rainbow in the hairs, and they looked more like a really long parade of Mome-Raths than anything else.
However, when I had reached the end of the line, a girl in a Pikachu costume snapped me back to reality.

Great exhibition!

Yesterday was the group exhibition with Helsinki International Artist's Association. It went really well, I sang there also, with a couple of guys that were really great. One played the piano and another one sang and played the accordian (or that how one writes it...?). They managed to play all 3 songs I had just like that without having rehearsed first so that was quite impressive. The singing went pretty well, exept that I was more nervous than usual because I hadn't been able to rehearse with them beforehand.

Many people seemed to like my painting. I think many were surprised to see a painting with Michael Jackson in it, but they all said they really liked the mood. And that made me very happy as I really wanted people to feel like they would enjoy being there as well.

Saturday, 19 September 2009

Visit from Norway!

My grandmother came yesterday, and I'm very happy. It's always so nice to get a visit from Norway, and Mammy always brings life anywhere she goes!
Today we were supposed to go to Ateneum, the main finnish museum to have a look at the Picasso exhibition that opened yesterday, and shop a bit. But we ended up shopping A LOT, with no museum visit. My main goal was to find, a new bag, something to have in my hair for the exhibition thats coming up in tuesday, and a new wallet. Sure enough, I managed to get my old and battered Donald Duck wallet changed with a more elegant one, but I also ended up with a new jacket, a skirt, a dress, a new pair of shoes and a whole bunch of candy! I'm also sitting here with a film that I'm too tired to see..."Fanboys", but I do look forward to see it tomorrow (and I hope they we're worth those extra 5 EUROS I have to pay to have it an extra day!).

Sunday, 13 September 2009

I'm in!

There is an art exhiition called "Høstutstillingen" that I have talked about before here, that I have submitted art for, in the hope that a jury would pick me to be in it. This is in Norway, and is for established artist's only. This year though, they have an opening for anyone who wants to try to be part of it, with the jury picking out the ones they like the most.

I'm really happy to say that I got accepted! I'm so exhited, it's probably the biggest exhibition I will be part of so far, and it's just too bad that I can't be in Norway when it opens.

I sent in 5 works, and they said that they wanted more, but could only pick out one, since it had been so many people wanting to be part of it this year. They picked out "What is Home?", a self portrait where I'm holding my French passport in my hand, while having a Norwegian flag wrapped around my head.

Saturday, 12 September 2009

I'm on the radio!

Well, actually, I was on thursday. But since the program I was in are sending their interviews in at the time where most people are at work, theres an internet site also where you can listen to it.
I'm a member of the Helsinki International Artist Association (HIAA), and the program "Thirty Minutes of Fame" are interviewing some of it's members. I'm number 2 on the list, discussing art and other things.

Check it out:

Friday, 11 September 2009


Yes, and I know some more too!
I have started to take Spanish lessons. I felt it was a good idea to do so, since Simo and I have talked a bit about possibly moving to Los Angeles. This summer, on Route 66, I got surprised to notice how many people actually spoke Spanish and NOTHING else in America. I mean, I knew, but not that it was so many.

The class is in a place where I take art lessons as well, and it is in Swedish. As most of you know, I speak Swedish at work.
The teacher was cool, quite young and in a good mood. There was many more students there that what I expected.
When the teacher asked who knew a littlebit Spanish or had studied it before, this lady behind me said: "Well, I know French perfectly, so I'm sure it won't be that hard to learn this". The teacher said that she should remember that this is not French though, and while there might be similarities, it's a completely different language. During the whole class, the woman exclaimed "Oh, it's JUST like in French!" To almost anything, and after the class she went to the teacher and started speaking French to him. Actually, he knew French, and since I also stood there I started speaking French to him too (I AM French, but suck at the grammar, since I lived in Norway almost my whole life...). The woman shot me a furious look, as if I had taken her few minutes of glory, and looked me up and down. When I met her in the bathroom later, she started asking pretty much my whole life story in French, and the funny part was that she absolutely sucked at it. I don't think I understood half of what she said.
I wonder how fast she'll learn Spanish...

Sunday, 6 September 2009

One finished painting, one to go...

There are two art exhibitions coming up for me in september. Hopefully...
The one that I will for sure be a part of is Helsinki Interntational Artist's Association's exhibition here in Helsinki, and the other one is one in Norway. The one in Norway has a jury and you have to send in your works to them and wait for an answer, if you have been accepted or not. I hope I will be, but we'll see.

So the HIAA (in Helsinki) exhibition have a theme of self portraits and "Wishful Thinking". I am now working on a painting inspired by the Route 66 trip, but I also just finished a selfportrait with Michael Jackson called something as imaginative as "Wishful Thinking"...
I'd like to share it here with you. Enjoy!

Saturday, 5 September 2009

My new haircut!

So I went to the hairdresser today, and did the big thing. I cut my hair short.
I expected to sit in my livingroom crying about this time, wondering how I could ever do something like that, but I'm surprised. I'm actually REALLY happy with the outcome! I think I look great, and it's really liberating to have short hair, not feeling it dangeling in the back of my neck.

So check out the video that I've uploaded here, from the hairdresser.

Thursday, 3 September 2009

I'm gonna cut my hair. Reeeally short...

I've had long hair all my life. The shortest I've had was shoulder lenght.
It's time for a change.

The reason why I have decided to cut my hair is that it's extreemely damaged. I have bleached it 3 or 4 times in a year or two, and it's really destraoyed my hair. I haven't cut it in a long time, and the other day when I went to the hairdresser, desperately asking for some hair cure that could maybe save my hair, she told me that I had to cut it. There's no saving possible.

So I thought, why not just cut it short? Audrey Hepburn/Natalie Portman style. It's gonna grow back out, and it's good with a change. I know I will regret it, but then again, I do just when I cut the end as well.

So lets see if I chicken out or not when the time comes.
I will bring a camera so that you can see my experience...oh my.

Monday, 31 August 2009

Every night...EEEVERY single night...

So, since I spoke about Milla earlier, I would like to show you a peice of our daily life with our beast. Simo says in the tape that this is not every day, but it is, and he know's the truth. We call this "The Bed Dance". It something that Milla feels that she has to do every time she comes to bed. Why I'm not sure. Sometimes we're so lucky as to get two performances, when Simo comes to bed a bit after I do.

Sunday, 30 August 2009

August 29th.

This date has a special meaning to me.
It's Michael Jackson's birthday.

I have been a fan of Michael Jackson since I was 10 years old. I remember seeing the In The Closet music video first, and I was so disgusted by this man who was rubbing himself all over Naomi Campbell! I was so disgusted in fact, that I actually said to my friend: "I'm never gonna buy a single album of this guy! Never!"
Oh how wrong one can be...
I just couldn't avoid Michael, because when he was in Norway for the Dangerous Tour, there was a program about him on TV. I accidentally taped it, and got so fascinated my this man (who I didn't know was the same one from In The Closet), that I couldn't stop watching the program.
The day after, I had bought my first Michael Jackson poster. It' still hanging in my childhood room in Norway.

Liking something or someone different is never easy, and I discovered that, especially after 1993 when the big question was: Is Michael Jackson a pedophile or not?
And how this world works, most people like to think so. I said "like to think so". Yes, I think they actually enjoy the thought.
However, I stayed a fan still, after being teased in school, I stayed strong, and I never changed who I was for anybody.
It's ironic, because today I would like to thank the people who teased me in school for giving me a test much harder than any school can provide, the only test that I passed with A+, and certainly the most important one.
The test of character, and staying true to yourself!

To celebrate not the day Michael Jackson would have been 51, but the day he came to this world and gave us his gift, I will share a link with you, to a rare interview of Michael, by Brett Ratner. I saw it for the first time today, and it's something else. Like Michael.
Two minutes of audio first, before the image will appear, but have patience and listen closely to very wise words, and maybe if you haven't already done so, you can also pass your test.

Thank you Michael, for not taking shit from anybody!

Friday, 28 August 2009

That's NOT my daughter!

Have you seen Animal Cops on Animal Planet? Have you seen when they rescue fighting dogs? Have you seen a fighting dog?
Me neither. But apparently my dog Milla is quite a bully when her parents aren't around.

Simo's friend had Milla when we were in USA this summer. He told me that one night he was at his friend's place and they got drunk. They started to play fight. Guess who joined in! Apparantly she has started to attack Simo's friend's "enemy's" sock! So my child is quite a guard dog I've understood. A loyal friend who will an kick anyone's ass who tries to mess with her family!

A picture says more than a thousand words...

Sunday, 23 August 2009


FINALLY we got a Blu-ray player! We've been meaning to buy this for a long time, especially since I thought I could play my dearly unplayed american Zone 1 DVD's on it. We found out that actually, even Blu-ray has this idiotic system with the Zones and it makes me angry! WHY?!
I understand the French; they have a need to be different from all the rest of Europe and have a different system (I can make fun - I'm French!), but why make two different world Zones for DVD, after so many people have complained over it. I don't understand how it's positive in any way.

Anyway, we bought the Blu-ray player, and I'm glad we did. I never thought that I was really gonna see any difference in the quality of the picture, but I was completely wrong. The difference is so huge and it looks like the image is gonna come out of the TV screen and join you on the sofa! (So you can imagine how scary it was to watch Pirates of the Caribbean! Except the Jack Sparrow parts of course...)
Long live Blu-ray! Seriousely, let it stay for a while...

Friday, 21 August 2009


Today I saw a 15 minute sneak preview. Simo works for FS Film here in Helsinki, so he get all that kinda goodies, like premiere tickets, sneak previews and free films. YAY! So I had no idea what to expect. And I can safely say that I still don't have any idea what to expect.
I thought it would be more of a mixture of real life cinema and animation, but it seemed more animation to me. Also, I thought it would be sci-fi, but it seemed more fantasy. I think I would like it when I see the whole story and the meaning of it all, but now it was a bit dissapointing. The dialogue with the animation seemed more like a children/teen film, with a female character with a weird (I guess sexy) accent and VERY skimpy clothes. They JUST covered her private parts, but as soon as we saw her sideways, we could see her nipple...interesting.

This better be good, James!

Back to work!

So the summer is officially over. I had my first work week after a very long (but not long enough) and nice summer holiday.
I am working in a different kindergarden than before. I have been there many times, as I am under a company, being the one kindergarden "teacher" there who goes between 4 places, which ever needs me at the moment. I like it that way - I get to meet different people and some variation in my work.

I have also been painting a lot this week. I have to paint for two upcoming exhibitions. One of them is in Norway and there is a jury that elects the paintings they want in the exhibition, so I hope I will be part of it. But I only have a bit more than a week to finish a painting, so I don't have much time for anything else. I guess you can say that I work two jobs right now.

Thursday, 13 August 2009

My Meaning of Life.

The other day I found "The meaning of life." Or to be correct - MY meaning.
We all have a different one, and we all have a different way or experiencing our crazy world. Some people never find their meaning of life. Some people don't think they have one. I found mine, and I feel really good.
I can't tell anyone how to find theirs, since we are all different.

A few days ago I had a really bad day. I'm talking about really bad. I was alone that day, after a pretty normal day or drawing, all the negative thoughts that could possibly fit into my head found me. They took control of me, and I could not get it together.
I was angry with the world, and all it's crazyness. I was angry that I coulnd't be safe on this planet that we call "home". If it's home, why can't I feel safe there?

Suddenly, I found a thought that stopped my negative feelings. A thought that has completely changed me since then. That thought made me accept the world and many of the people in it for what it is, eventhough I might not feel it's right.
I haven't felt this calm in a long time. It's fantastic. I can focus and cope with what I need to do.

If you ever find that special thought that changes you - keep it. Don't let it just float into the others.

Thursday, 6 August 2009

Stop teasing my pal!

My grandmother has bought a new cabin. It's very nice, by a lake and it even comes with a boat. I've never been a big cabin person. I don't know, maybe I've just seen too many horror films taken place at a cabin, who knows?
But a few days ago I went with dad to check out the new cabin, and to my surprise I actually liked it.
Our dog, Jackie, went straight to the water and kept a good eye on the ducks coming in to get fed by us. She is a bird dog after all, so I would say she did a pretty good job. We noticed that in the beginning there was only one duck coming to us. We fed it for a while until more showed up, wanting a piece of the cake too.
But the other ducks started chasing the first duck, and the first one had to all the time make sure that she had time to go and grab a quick breadbite before the others noticed it and started chasing her again. I felt so sorry for the first duck that I hid behind a tree trying to throw only to her. I went close to where she was, outside the gang of the other ducks. But of course the other ducks noticed me and came greedily towards me, while chasing the first duck away. The whole situation must have looked pretty hilarious, with me jumping up and down screaming to the other ducks, -"Assholes! Get away from my duck! Stop teasing my pal!"

The interesting part was that the fist duck had to keep away from the rest, but while the rest swam stupidly around just quacking, the first duck actually made sure that she could get some food by coming to the edge and take the rest of the bread that the others had overlooked.
I guess that even in nature it is the the ones that are picked on that usually use their head...

Monday, 3 August 2009

The story of Omer Bhatti...

For me, who has grown up in Norway, it's so absurd and almost funny how the world is now speculating if Omer Bhatti is Michael Jackson's 4th child.
He is not.

Omer is a Norwegian-Pakistani boy who grew up in Norway, entertaining as a child as a Michael Jackson impersonator. A fantastic dancer and really down to earth, he charmed Norway. When he was 12 (I think) he met Michael by pure chance when he danced infront of his hotel in Prague (if I remember correctly) when he was there to see the HIStory concert. Michael arrived at the hotel, and the fans knocked Omer down. Michael saw it and saved Omer from the fans almost killing him. After that they became friends.
Things like this actually happen, and that is the story (more or less, I'm sure). THAT is why Omer kinda looks like Michael, he is not his son.
I don't know where Joseph Jackson gets his information from, and it's really strange that he goes to the media and says that Omer is Michael's child.
Even Omer says that he is not Michael's son.

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

A REAL welcome!

After all the pain and hardship on Frankfurt Airport, it was really nice to come back to Finland and to Milla, who gave us a real warm welcome home!

Welcome to Europe, especially Frankfucked.

Yes; Frankfucked. Because that's pretty much what you are if you're in transit here in Frankfurt; fucked. (Pardon my french...)
So. I have no words. No words at all, all I can say is that this 8 hours arriving and waiting at the airport at Frankfurt has been most interesting and frustrating. I will now write 3 REAL shorty-short stories here, that tells you all my adventures here at Frankfucked. Enjoy.

(I apologise for some private but necessary information that has to be shared in the first story...)

«The Humble Toilet Experience.»

Finally we were landing. The flight had been so so long. -»It's gonna be so nice to relax at the airport in Frankfurt», I thought. «Eventhough we have to wait for almost eight hours.» Suddenly I felt a wierd sensation. One that only a woman can relate to. -»My period!»
I looked panickly around me. The toilet is just behind me. The seatbelt light is on, we're landing and there's no escape.
I rushed to the toilet when we had landed and stood in an agonizing line. It was my turn, and the girl coming out of toilet shared an innocent smile with me, as if she knew something I didn't. Finally in the toilet and I'm happy. I looked to the left. No toiletpaper!
-» Eh...excuse me!» I knocked on the wall of my neighbour. «Do you think you could just give me some paper under the wall? There's no more paper here.»
There was a breif silence, but long enough for me to wonder if she understood english. Then she found out what to answer: - «Please.»
At first I didn't think I heard right. There was no other way than to ask. -» Excuse me,» I said. But there was no escaping it. She had her kick, she had me trapped in the palm of her hand. Complete power. -»Please,» she repeated. As if the situation in itself wasn't humiliating enough, the other women in the line waiting were now giggeling. -»Pleeease,» I said, hoping for a quick result. But before my merciful neighbour could give me her gift, a woman who understood the foolishness of the situation gave me paper under the door. Thank God for normal people. Next trip to the toilet will be paper-checked before any action.

«Welcome to Europe!»

Right after the toilet experience I was in a pretty bad mood. Simo stopped a lady and asked where to go, since nobody would tell us for some reason. I was soon to discover how difficult people who were supposed to help you here could be. She told us to go to a certain «B – something-gate» and we went towards the place. We came to some escalators and there was a guard there that made it seem that once we crossed this point, we couldn't go back. However, there was no control or passport check. The guard standing there looked at me and I at him.
We went up the escalators and discovered that it lead to a tram going to the other gates. We still didn't know if those were the gates we needed to go to, since it didn't say on the tickets. We went back down and Simo decided that we should go back and ask the woman for help.
-»Hey! You can't go through here», the guard screamed. Simo tried to explain the situation, and that we were lost and needed help to find our gate. The guard looked at his as if he was an alien, and shook his head. -»You can't go through here, you have to go to the gate now.» I jumped in: -»Yes, but you know that we just came from here,» I pointed towards the direction we wanted to go back to. -»I didn't see you,» he said. - «But you looked at me! I looked at you, we had eyecontact!» At that moment another man came there. He was dressed in a suit and I though that we could finally get some help. He talked with the other guard and seemed upset that he had «let us come back down there». We tried to explain the situation again. He was on the other guard's side and said -»He says that he can't know if you guys went through here already, he didn't see you.» - «Well then he's blind,» I said. «We had eyecontact.» The suit-guy started to get very rude, and I got so angry that I don't even remember what he said. When I had enough I said: -»Thanks a lot! This is really a warm welcome to Europe!» I went on my way back up the escalators after Simo and Henrik before I heard him loud and clear: -» Well go back to the US then!» I couldn't believe my ears! I could MAYBE believe it in Paris in some random store, but not in the customs at an european airport that should welcome you to your country. I suddenly remembered that I was wearing my cowboyhat and turned around to face him. He had his back towards me. - «EXCUSE ME?!» He turned around quickly: -»What?!» -» How dare you? And actually I'm not American, I'm French!» - «French? Ooooooohhh...», he said, as if he had finally figured out why I was completely crazy.
If there is one thing I truly admire with Americans it is that they really make you feel welcome and they know customer service. This I have told most Americans I know. -» Excuse me, but do you know what customer service is?» He looked at me in a puzzled way that proved that he had absolutely no clue right there and then. -» Yes.» -» No, you don't», I said. «I thought we French were rude, but this is far up there!»
That shut him up. Maybe I hit a sore spot.
But seriousely, I can really understand how so many Americans get shocked when they come here and meet some europeans. Some of them can be so rude! And it's so sad that I've actually gotten used to that treatment.

«A little help please?»

No help. Many people everywhere, but completely alone. That's Frankfurt Airport for you.
In our hunt for some nice seats to lay one since we haven't slept very much, Simo asked me to ask someone if we could go to the Lufthansa Lounge since we're travelling with them. The Lounge is a place that has very nice seats and is quiet. I went on my quest. Not a single person that I could ask, and no Information Desk anywhere. -»Hm, I guess I could ask this guy», I thought. He was standing by the gate taking the tickets of passengers boarding on a flight. I saw that he was busy of course and decided to wait until there was so passengers left. -»Excuse me, could I ask you a question?» The guy starts waving his hands in a frantic fashion that reminds me more of Bruno by Sasha Baron Cohen that anyone else, -»It's REALLY not a good time right now!!!!» I got completely taken aback and went quietly away like a frightened littel girl. -»Oh. Sorry.»
But on my continued quest I couldn't find anyone who could help me. At all. What the hell? It's not MY fault that Frankfurt Airport has no people to help their customers? I went back to the guy, the only person I saw working anywhere and waited until he seemed available again. I stood a bit away from the guy, held out my arms and said: -»Can you PLEASE help me? I have a question, is there ANYWHERE here where I can get information?» The guy never looked up at me of course, that would have been to much to expect, and said in a hysterical way: -»Can't help you right now!!» - «All I have is a question! Is the any information place here?
-»I just need some information!»
A loud sigh. -»Information about what?!» I took my chance. -»I was just wondering if I can go to the Lufthansa Lounge.»
-»Yes, you can, but only if you have a business ticket...IT'S REALLY NOT A GOOD TIME RIGHT NOW!!!!!!»
I went away in fear of getting hit by one of his flapping hands. -»Take it easy man! All right.» Then he screamed; -»BUT YOU DON'T NEED TO PANIC!!» - «But you're the one panicking man, I just wanted an answer to a simple question, I can't get help anywhere in this place!»

It's seriousely a nightmare. Simo just checked right now at this moment that I'm sitting and writing all this at Frankfucked Airport, if our flight was on shedule. That was apparently the most difficult thing to get an answer to, no information on any time boards and the woman he asked didn't answer his question until he had asked three times.

Right now I can't wait to get back to Finland where people don't smile, but are helpful.

(But at least they have Coca-Cola in glassbottles here...yummy...)

Last day of our adventure...

On sunday we met another friend; Kimber and her husband Jeff. We wanted to go and see the promenade in Santa Monica and go to a bookstore, so we met a Barnes and Noble at the promenade. We went to eat lunch at a very lovely french restaurant in the middle of the promenade also. They served all the typical french food, the cheeses, the bread and the drinks...yummy. I suddenly missed Paris. I got a really good salad with camembert. We then went to the bookstore. I got 4 science fiction books and Simo got some poker books. Henrik also bought "I am Legend". We walked around on the promenade and we noticed how many people were playing Michael Jackson there, and wearing t-shirts with him on and dancing. It's nice to see. We even met another fan with a t-shit on that wanted to take a picture with us. (Kimber is also a fan and was wearing a t-shirt, like me.) This girl was from Belgium I think.

We walked for a bit longer, but decided to maybe meet later. We had to pack since we were going to the airport in the nighttime.
Henrik, Simo and I came back to our hotel and packed pretty much everything. Wow, we had so much, what a luxuryproblem! Luckily, Simo had bought an extra suitcase, so we all put some of our extra stuff in there.
Then we went out to eat for the last time in LA. Henrik invited us out to dinner since we had "taken him to USA" and we went back to our favourite Sushi place called "Koji's" at Hollywood Highland. They have Shabu Shabu there, and both Simo and Henrik bought that. I had an old fashioned sushi selection.
We went to the LAX airport pretty much right after that. First we needed to drop off our car at the Alamo service there. All went smooth. When we came to our terminal it was so quiet. There were many people there already, but most of them were sleeping on chairs and the floor. Nothing had opened yet. It was kinda creepy with this really wierd elevator background music on also. Sort of like a different David Lynch like world...but maybe it felt like that mostly because I was tired... A couple of hours later, at 4.00 in the morning, the check-in desks opened. We checked in, but as I feared all of our suitcases were over weight. The woman said that it was 150 dollars per suitcase. We were all like "oh no", and I said to Simo that maybe theres a place her that sells suitcases since it's an airport? Oh how naive of me. But he asked her then if they didn't have a box or something. That was luck. Of course they had, but of course they wouldn't say that to us unless we asked first, 'cause that box costed only 11 dollars, and they would lose their 489 that they COULD have gotten! Phew! I was so glad. So we packed from all our luggage to balance the weight and got checked in.

And so it's monday. The LAX airport is pretty boring. We ate a terrible wok, and as my last desperate fatty-food from America atemt, I ate it all! Oh yes...I could feel the fat just slowly and probably glistening travelling and dripping down on my teeth.

The flight from LA to Chicago went pretty well. Both Henrik and I slept the whole way. We didn't sit together any of us, but it was OK.
When we arrived in Chicago we got seats together and got on the flight pretty fast. Also a pretty comfortable flight; we had the most well-behaved children in front of us, but Henrik who sat on the other side of the ile, had a screaming baby behind him. Oh joy.